Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Bad, Bad Leroy Brown

Baddest Man in the Whole Damn Town...

Some of us saw Cindy Sheehan on the Bill Maher show the other night.

By the way, an informal poll of our staff shows that the best joke from the Maher Show went something like this:

Oil Companies should stop making commercials about how they care about the environment. There are these commercials where they show birds, seagulls and pigeons and talk about how they want to protect animals. The only thing pigeons and oil executives have in common is that they would both steal french fries from a baby.

Most of us laughed. Sure oil executives are greedy vultures, but that is what they are paid to be. Their efforts to maximize their profits are what makes our economy efficient. Adam Smith and the invisible hand. Each person acting in their own best interests produces an efficient society. There is nothing wrong with making money.

But even an undergraduate economics major understands that this invisible hand rule is pretty simple and assumes that their are no hidden costs to one's actions. The costs are usually only hidden to the one imposing them on others. For example, the person whose water source is Lake Superior notices the costs of water pollution in the lake, but the company that dumped their waste there 50 years ago certainly did not ever see the costs (they were hidden).

How do we reconcile our conservative beliefs with our understanding that externalities do exist? Do we trust that the market will produce technology to clean up environmental problems or that if it really did hurt consumers they would negotiate with companies and compensate them for not polluting their water?

Well, Lake Superior water drinks may bear the full costs of Lake Superior water pollution and they may be the sole beneficiaries of any clean up. Why would they not clean it up? If it was really worth it to them why wouldn't they clean it? Well, this could be a free rider problem in that the entire group of Lake Superior water drinkers must contribute money to clean up the lake. But even if one person doesn't contribute they will benefit from the clean-up. Thus all these rational people will tend to underfund clean-up efforts since they rationalize that they can minimize their contribution but still receive the benefits. Thus the market may not produce a technology because no one will pay for it.

Can consumers negotiate with companies? Where would this happen? Well, in the court room for one. We say John Travolta in Civil Action and we know you can sue companies for pollution or harms to your health. But as conservatives we kind of hate these type of lawsuits. But, at least in some cases, they are obviously good things as they make companies realize their hidden costs and this may cause them to pollute less or not at all. Of course, these lawsuits usually happen after pollution has occured.

Unfortunately, these costs are not has hidden as first implied. If they are so hidden from corporations why do they go to great lengths to hide environmental harm? For years some corporations polluted and did it in secret. Why? Did they realize the costs and just didn't want to pay? If they did it in secret they must have known that their actions would be unpopular and might even cause harm to people (like Lake Superior water drinkers). Since the knew about the costs they must have known that people might actually pay them to dispose of their waste in an environmentally friendly way.

Why did they not approach people and ask them to pay? Did they know about the free rider problem and that they just couldn't get enough cash to dispose of waste properly? Did they want to negotiate but they didn't know who to talk with? Or did they think that it was worth more to them to pollute than it was for others to keep the environment clean, meaning that people could never compenstate them enough to not pollute?

If this last point is true than the market simply has not created the incentives for negotiation. If the savings from polluting are greater than the potential compensation from consumers for being environmentally friendly than there is no reason for companies to approach consumers to ask them to pay for clean disposal.

But then why advertise about being environmentally friendly? Why care? The only way they must care is if there is some cost associated with being perceived as environmentally unfriendly. This cost must be greater than the cost of making and airing commercials.

there is no point, only writing...
-Marcus and the gang

Sunday, August 28, 2005

All I need is the air that I breathe

And We don't want it polluted by dirty hippies!
How's that for an update!

Thursday, August 18, 2005


More liberal whining. Ugh. It drives us crazy.

The liberals in the back of the office are still moaning about their being displaced from the prime seats next to the water cooler. In fact, just yesterday, I (that's me Marcus) got a call from one of their mothers! Can you believe that? Running to the skirts (no offense ladies) when there is trouble. Is there anything more shameless? Anyway, this guy's mother (his name is withheld so as to avoid embarassing him further) called me up and said that Bjorn deserved his seat near the water cooler and that I was making him unhappy. She said that the my initial reasons for moving him were a lie and that I continued to justify his displacement with falsities.

Well, well, well. Just because I told Bjorn he had to be temporarily moved because he was getting a new desk and then when that new desk was delivered I took this new desk, thus forcing Bjorn to sit at the card table in the back with Sven, Margie, Kyle, Laura, and Otto is no reason to cast me as the evildoer here. It is survival of the fittest, lady. I am only reinforcing the evolutionary vehicle that in the long run will only make all of us stronger and more genetically beautiful. I thought liberals liked evolution?

Anyway, on to the news of the day. More soldiers died in Iraq. These young men and women (well, mostly men) are making brave sacrifices every day. Why do the liberals continue to cheapen their sacrifice by complaining about the war? How are our soldiers supposed to fight with a clear moral certitude if we've got long hairs running around with candles chanting Kumbi-fucking-ah? Don't you get it? We're at war, we need to come together and support the effort. This is not the time to be divisive.

Once again we'd like to remind our liberal readers that Canada is a big country, there's room, they want your hippy asses, go there!

See the picture below of an anti-war Dinkelhoffer at a peace rally:

This kid obviously got his lunch taken and his hair pulled one too many times by some kid who actually had a future and saw that this loser had none. Now he's all angry and non-violent and while smoking his doobies he probably bangs some make-shift bongo drum while reciting some horrible spoken word peotry about God being love.

Well, sometimes God is love, but sometimes he needs to kick some ass.

Friday, August 12, 2005

Narration Vacation

Well, wouldn't you know it. The Nameless Narrator is on vacation. That leaves me, Marcus, to post for awhile. Finally, an end to the annoying liberal slant of this publication. I will now commence with the normal use of "we"...

We here at littleboxes have turned over a new leaf. We are sick of the whining about the Iraq war. Saddam Hussein was and is a despicable human being. He deserved to be deposed as the leader of Iraq. The transition to democracy is difficult but it is a goal that must be acheived. We cannot afford to fail and some of the liberals would certainly like us to.

While some view failure as an option we believe that democracy must succeed in Iraq no matter the human costs.

Some of our friends think we should just nuke the fuckers and stop the insurgency. We aren't that stupid. We need more troops, not less and more money for the war, not less.

Sure, some of our staff are complaining from the back of the room. Aurora has rearranged the office and now JEN and I are sitting near the water cooler. You'd think the liberals would be whining about our stance on the war, but instead they are whining about the new office arrangements. These overeducated east coast liberals are shallow if they are anything. Folks, this is some prized real estate and we are not leaving anytime soon. You liberals in the back got your Kenneth Cole pants in a twist over our new desks. Well, why don't you do something about it?

Nothing! A bunch of wimps just like we thought. The conservatives will keep posting until these little liberal fairies show some backbone.

We now echo the last post and say FUCK THE DEMOCRATS. At least we believe in something. We believe in hard work.

Thursday, August 11, 2005

Whelming Leaders

What really gets us about Iraq is not any perceived bungling of the war. Let's say that, for argument's sake, the Bush administration is orchestrating the war perfectly and that it will be considered a stone-cold success five to ten years from now. What gets us is all the lying. Why does the administration constantly use misinformation to promote or discuss the war. They always have these rosy descriptions of the situation in Iraq and have constantly deliberately (or, alternatively idiotically) underestimated the insurgency.

Can't we just get a little honesty? Sure, there are a few staff members who brought up the fact that Democrats lie as well and that if it were a Democratic president at war they would also likely sugarcoat the truth to make sure of high public morale. But after this was said, we all laughed and yelled in unison


We dont' give a shit if the Democrats are no better than Republicans. That is not an argument. We deserve better than a bunch of lying assholes running the country. And yes, not all Democrats and Republicans in Congress are lying assholes. Some of them are really nice liars while others are surely honest assholes.

The point is that just because George W. Bush and John F. Kerry are both, shall we say, underwhelming leaders, does not mean that we (the staff at littleboxes) do not deserve just regular whelming leaders. We don't even want an overwhelming leader, just a regular whelming leader will do.

Is that too much to ask? Yes, apparently so.

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

new music post

THE PANDA is back with some free music!!

littleboxes music

Tough Guy

Bo Bice is obviously a real bad ass. Would the guys in Metallica keep rockin' if they broke their feet? We rest our case.